


Bad jokes

by Amaya_Ithilwen



Series: Collection of RVB-OneShots [2]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon-Typical Humor, Canon-typical Cursing, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-12
Updated: 2015-02-12
Packaged: 2018-03-12 01:50:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3339341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amaya_Ithilwen/pseuds/Amaya_Ithilwen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tucker and Wash talking about bad jokes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bad jokes

“That was the worst joke ever, Tucker. Of all time.” Wash was outside on the roof of the base and observing the base of the reds through the spyglass on the rifle. It was a normal day on the blue base in Valhalla and Wash and Tucker were on duty. Caboose was doing something else, as you weren’t really able to use him as a responsible scout.

 

Okay, cut that, anybody here was responsible in any way. Not because they were Sim Troopers, because they were idiots. Zooming in, Wash could see Sarge and Lopez at the Warthog. Sarge was standing around while Lopez was doing something. Looked like repairs after Wash stopped the Warthog with an EMP-Bomb. Simmons was also somewhere there, obviously also working at the car to impress Sarge and make clear that he was better than the walking talking can. The smell in the nose of the freelancer told him, that Donut was making muffins again. And a faint cloud of smoke from a close-by cliff indicated that Grif again was doing nothing.

 

“Okay, okay. How about this one. Once there was an African, an American and a Japanese guy…”

Wash didn’t listen to Tuckers jokes. They were so fucking bad. Not bad in the meaning that they would get funny if they’re bad enough. Just bad. Also this one here was a pretty bad one. “Couldn’t come up with a better joke than that? That was even worse than the last.”

 

“Hey at least I’m trying! Ya know, it isn’t that easy to always come up with new ones.”

“If you ever come up with new stuff…”

“Hey have something like a joke-book around to learn new ones?”

“No, but as long as you’re not coming up with knock-knock-jokes…”

“Hey these jokes remind me of a computer we had to deal with in the base of O’Malley.”

“So?”

 

“Yeah, man! That guy was annoying, always talking with his robotic voice the computers in the early 20ieth century used to talk. And always those shitty knock-knock-jokes! Dude, that gary-Guy was a pretty annoying pal.”

“Wait a second, Gary you said?”

“Yeah, he introduced himself as Gary, why?”

“Well, I used to know him as Gamma. Until Wyoming gave him the name Gary.”

“Yeah? Was he always that annoying?”

“Even more as Wyoming had the same kind of bad humor. Imagine 2 hours of traveling in a space shuttle and these two always making those jokes.”

 

“Urgh, bad thing then.”

“Who are you telling that…. I was always relieved to fall unconscious when I got hurt during a mission with him. So I wouldn’t hear his stupid jokes.”

“Would have wanted that too man.”

Simmons jumped up and ran into the base as black smoke was coming out of the entrance. Obviously Donut again burnt the muffing and perhaps the whole kitchen. So they would be occupied for the moment.

 

Letting the rifle sink, Wash allowed his eyes to get use to how they were used normally and looked around. It was the same fucking view as every fucking day they got stuck here.

Now also Lopez and Sarge were gone, obviously also helping out in the base as the black smoke got more. Seems like Simmons and Donut didn’t achieve until now.

 

Tucker was now telling all the knock knock jokes he had. Caboose helped him in always asking who was there. Wash only rolled his eyes. As he looked back to the red base, he could now also see Grif returning and entering the base. The smoke hadn’t lessened. And Grif was only appearing because Sarge had knocked the stuffing out of him over the radio. They didn’t knew, but Wash had tapped their radio. So they could hear everything they were talking. But his team members slowly got on his nerves.

 

“Could you stop telling those fucking bad jokes?!”

“Then I have some of mine for you.”

“No, fucking tell new ones!”

“So should I tell those I learnt from Grif?”

 

“For the love of god, no. Wait a moment, you did what?!”

“I listened to the jokes Grif was telling Simmons over the radio.”

“I tapped the radio to get information about their strategies, not to learn stupid jokes!


End file.
